OUCH! Anyone interested in helping me?!
Question: OUCH! Anyone interested in helping me!?
ok so my boyfriend really likes anal!. We have done it a few times but it really really hurts me!. He really really likes it and I really wanna please him, but is there a less painful way to making it pleasurable for me!? i do everything else with him, but its like thats what he wants the most!. I want to please him but is there something I can do so it wont hurt as bad!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
I'm not sure we should assume so much about what the boyfriend really wants (men typically have a lot of trouble being considerate when it comes to sex, especially the young ones), so let's stick to the facts!.!.!. At the same time, you need to make him a deal!. (You will both benefit from this equally!.) Before he gets to have anal sex with you, he first has to please you COMPLETELY!. (full climax; not a small one, the big one) Either through clitoral stimulation, or vaginal sex!. (Why not all three!?)
I know this sounds great in itself, but this is his motivation for doing it: When you are initially aroused, the muscles in your anus begin to tighten which are the same muscles that control your vagina's contractions during child-birth, during sex and while enjoying an orgasm!. After that orgasm, these muscles release their vice-grip and relax almost completely!.
Now you're ready for anal sex, and NEVER before!.
Put down the ground rules WAY before the sex even begins!. YOU are in control of the anal sex and YOU decide when he moves his body inside you!. It is your body, and you wish to please him with it, so in order to do so you must take control!
Turn over onto your stomach, and lay a pillow just above your hips so that you are arched out and your anus is exposed!. Have your boyfriend cover his middle or index fingers in lubricant and delicately trace his finger-tips around your anus!.
(This may sound a bit disturbing to some but to your butt-obsessed boyfriend this will probably be very enticing!.)
You will instantly begin to notice that your anus is VERY sensitive and receptive to his touch!. Have him do this for a little while and then slip a finger in just to the first knuckle!. You will naturally begin to flex your anus and it will tighten around his finger!. Wait a few moments for your body to get used to his fingers presence and give him the okay to push his finger a little further in!. When it becomes uncomfortable just give him the signal to stop!. Let your body adjust and then let him push it further in!. Keep this up until his finger is fully into your anus!.
Let your body become completely comfortable with the presence of his finger in you, then have him very slowly slide his finger most of the way out!. Then have him slide it very slowly back in!. You may actually begin to enjoy it if he does this correctly and is not in a hurry!. (Remember that bit about taking control!? It is important to be very verbal about when he can move and how fast!. Don't let his vigor and anticipation push your comfort aside!.)
When you are fully adjusted to his finger sliding with some speed in and out of your anus, it is time to begin stretching it open so that it can eventually accept his penis!. So now you will have him do this entire procedure over again, with a new application of lubricant and two fingers!.
After you're comfortable with that, the next step can either be three fingers or his penis -- depending on the width of his member!. Just remember to take your time and keep him from getting in a hurry while he is pushing his penis into you!. It may feel good, but this can actually be an enjoyable experience for both of you if he will just do it right!.
Make sure he knows that -- tell him you may actually WANT to do it with him if he will just give you the chance to adjust to his big thing inside of you!. (That's right, play to his ego, we love that!.)
Further Tips:
-Lubricant is SUPER important in not being harmed during anal sex!.
-Eventually, if everything works out and he's not super large or your anus isn't super small, your body will adjust to to doing this and he will be able to stick it in without having to go through all of this trouble!.
Good luck sweet-heart and make sure to take control!. It's still your body!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I know this sounds great in itself, but this is his motivation for doing it: When you are initially aroused, the muscles in your anus begin to tighten which are the same muscles that control your vagina's contractions during child-birth, during sex and while enjoying an orgasm!. After that orgasm, these muscles release their vice-grip and relax almost completely!.
Now you're ready for anal sex, and NEVER before!.
Put down the ground rules WAY before the sex even begins!. YOU are in control of the anal sex and YOU decide when he moves his body inside you!. It is your body, and you wish to please him with it, so in order to do so you must take control!
Turn over onto your stomach, and lay a pillow just above your hips so that you are arched out and your anus is exposed!. Have your boyfriend cover his middle or index fingers in lubricant and delicately trace his finger-tips around your anus!.
(This may sound a bit disturbing to some but to your butt-obsessed boyfriend this will probably be very enticing!.)
You will instantly begin to notice that your anus is VERY sensitive and receptive to his touch!. Have him do this for a little while and then slip a finger in just to the first knuckle!. You will naturally begin to flex your anus and it will tighten around his finger!. Wait a few moments for your body to get used to his fingers presence and give him the okay to push his finger a little further in!. When it becomes uncomfortable just give him the signal to stop!. Let your body adjust and then let him push it further in!. Keep this up until his finger is fully into your anus!.
Let your body become completely comfortable with the presence of his finger in you, then have him very slowly slide his finger most of the way out!. Then have him slide it very slowly back in!. You may actually begin to enjoy it if he does this correctly and is not in a hurry!. (Remember that bit about taking control!? It is important to be very verbal about when he can move and how fast!. Don't let his vigor and anticipation push your comfort aside!.)
When you are fully adjusted to his finger sliding with some speed in and out of your anus, it is time to begin stretching it open so that it can eventually accept his penis!. So now you will have him do this entire procedure over again, with a new application of lubricant and two fingers!.
After you're comfortable with that, the next step can either be three fingers or his penis -- depending on the width of his member!. Just remember to take your time and keep him from getting in a hurry while he is pushing his penis into you!. It may feel good, but this can actually be an enjoyable experience for both of you if he will just do it right!.
Make sure he knows that -- tell him you may actually WANT to do it with him if he will just give you the chance to adjust to his big thing inside of you!. (That's right, play to his ego, we love that!.)
Further Tips:
-Lubricant is SUPER important in not being harmed during anal sex!.
-Eventually, if everything works out and he's not super large or your anus isn't super small, your body will adjust to to doing this and he will be able to stick it in without having to go through all of this trouble!.
Good luck sweet-heart and make sure to take control!. It's still your body!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Years ago we had a young male come into the ER with really bad hemorrhoids, rectal fissures, bleeding, etc!. The on-call surgeon comes in and sees the patient so I ask, what the heck!. Someone so young shouldn't have all those rectal problems!. "Does someone need to tell him to eat more fiber or what!?" I ask!. The surgeon says, "Someone needs to tell him that his rectum is a one way valve!. Things are supposed to come out!. Not go up there!."
"oh!.!.!.!." says I in a small voice!. How naive of me to think he needs to eat more mini wheats for breakfast!.
You can take a lesson from that surgeon or you can you use common sense!. When your body has pain it is telling you something, "Stop, this doesn't feel good!. This is causing damage!. Don't do this to me!."
Every time you punch the wall it hurts your hand!. Are you going to keep punching the wall because your bf likes it so much no matter your hand feels!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
"oh!.!.!.!." says I in a small voice!. How naive of me to think he needs to eat more mini wheats for breakfast!.
You can take a lesson from that surgeon or you can you use common sense!. When your body has pain it is telling you something, "Stop, this doesn't feel good!. This is causing damage!. Don't do this to me!."
Every time you punch the wall it hurts your hand!. Are you going to keep punching the wall because your bf likes it so much no matter your hand feels!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
rose , i agree with others!.!.!. if it hurts you than where is the pleasure for him!? seems like he's more about the physical with you than the emotional you!. i know you may not want to hear this and i am certain you must (think you) love him a whole bunch to allow yourself to feel pain during something that is supposed to give you pleasure both physically and emotionally!. i understand you asked if there is a way to make it less painful for you !.!.!. i don't know myself but i would imagine only lubrication would help along with time!. meaning you may have to hurt a lot more for a lot longer to get your body use to it!. i suppose you'll have to decide if it's worth it!. will he understand you're not into hurting!? if not he doesn't care about you the way you deserve to be cared about!. in my opinion that is!. i don't mean to sound judgmental if that's how i sound, i'm sorry!. i just don't like hearing that a fellow "sister" feels she must endure pain to pleasure her man!. you take care of you and let him know how it is making you feel!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
to heck with what your boyfriend likes i would tell him hell noway u want it like that go else where first in my opinion after i say it hurts and he wants to continue he has no respect for u or himself if he doesn't care that it hurts hell with that i am disgusted with yer man and i don't even know himWww@Answer-Health@Com
What about your pleasure!?It seems to me that he is'nt a very caring boyfriend to make you do something that is so painful to you!.Sit down and talk to him about it and if he says he don't understand then offer to stick something up his *** and see if he likes the way it feels!lolWww@Answer-Health@Com
Lubricant can make it a little bit less painfull
but trust me its never gonna feel pleasurable !.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
but trust me its never gonna feel pleasurable !.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
Tell him when he pulls it out there'll be poop and millions of microbes on his penis and he won't like the idea too much longer!Www@Answer-Health@Com