How do I advertise on contacts?!

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You mean to advertise on the boxes, or to have your name on the lenses themselves?
On the boxes is fairly straightforward; just ask your sales rep and they should be able to either print them custom for you, or at least do up some fancy stickers/labels to put over top.
On the lenses would be extraordinarily difficult. Custom painted lenses do exist, so I suppose it could be done, but it would have to be through a specialty lens manufacturer and would probably cost several hundred dollars per pair. (They're the custom-painted cosmetic lenses I'm thinking of; the ones we use to cover scarred corneas and that sort of thing.) Not sure if they'd do it, but they're the only ones who would even have the capability.

I'm an optometrist.