I need some personal lubricant. Any suggestions?!
Question: I think the reason I am having painful intercourse is because I need lubricant.
He is large and I have to wait for 2 days to have sex again because I am sore from being so dry.
What do you use and how do you manage to tell him you need some lube?
Answers: I think the reason I am having painful intercourse is because I need lubricant.
He is large and I have to wait for 2 days to have sex again because I am sore from being so dry.
What do you use and how do you manage to tell him you need some lube?
There are dozens of different kinds of lube. Ky liquid is available in 90% of drug stores and pharmacy sections, so I suggest trying that first. NOT KY jelly as it isnt designed for sex and is rather thick and slimy. Get the liquid to try first. There are people who prefer the jelly, but for first time lube it can be kind of gross and intimidating. Liquid waterbased lubes like KY are safe for condoms as well.
If you end up liking KY but want something that stays wetter longer and does not get sticky you can visit an adult website and look at silicone lubes. These are VERY slippery and a little bit goes a long way. They also will become wet again just by adding a little water. They can stain sheets though, so be sure to read the product label. They are also not compatible with silicone sex toys. They do work with condoms safely.
NEVER EVER use a petroleum based product like vaseline with condoms. NEVER! The oil can break down the latex of your condom, destroying its ability to protect you from pregnancy and stds. If you need a thicker lube, use a waterbased or silicone jelly not an oil.
www.blowfish.com lists lots of different styles of lubes that are safe for use in sex. They also have great explanations on what the lube feels like and suggested uses.
Be wary of "joke" lubes. Some of them are not intended for actual use and can contain ingredients that may irritate you or your partner. Some flavored lubes can also contain sugar which puts you at risk for yeast infections. Never use a cheap lube from a brand you dont recognize. Always research what you are putting on your crotch first.
To actually use a lube with a partner, just tell him whats going on! Say something like "Hey you know how I always end up sore after sex? Well I want to try this lube to see if it will help out." Most guys will jump at the chance to use a product that will make you more comfortable and enjoy sex more. Their logic is: If you're having a good time, you may want (and be able) to do it more often. Which is a sound truth in my opinion.
If your guy gets cranky and says "What, I don't get you excited enough?" Just explain that you love him and are hot for him, you just don't get quite wet enough. If you use condoms, tell him they tend to suck up a lot of your personal moisture (which is true, they can) and you need a little help. Needing some lube is not always an issue of "not being excited enough" Sometimes the rest of the body is ready and willing, you just arent soaked enough to take a large thrusting penis.
Lube can also serve as a bridge to getting wet naturally. If you have always had painful sex, it is going to be really hard to get soaking wet excited about the idea. You may desperately want to have sex, but your subconcious may hold your body back from being physically ready. So you play with your partner, get as horny as possible, and lube up. Once you discover that sex doesn't have to be painful and actually feels darn good, you may have an easier time responding in the future.
Lube is a help but not a substitute for foreplay. You STILL need to play with your partner first. He still needs to pay attention to your whole body and make you feel sexy and comfortable. All the lube in the world will not make sex awesome if you are not physically and emotionally warmed up first. It can save the day if you're ready but just not wet enough, but don't short yourself on foreplay either.
tell him, straight up thst you need ky jelly or something. But the lube always is the best way to go
well maybe your just not exited and thats why you dont get "wet"
or maybe you do need some lub.... go to walgreens , cvs, or any adult stores
KY has warming lubricant. (As opposed to "cold" -- brrr) Just put it under the pillow and whip it out when you need it. He may be too busy to notice. Or you could say, "I got something new for us to try, honey." If it makes it easier and more pleasurable for you, then he should be happy!
I'd introduce lubricant as something new and fun. Try and get the flavored kind, or even the warming/cooling type. It makes it a lot less awkward if you're making it fun. Try it out first by yourself, as some lubes may cause itching etc.
have fun
teach him how to get you all ready and prepared....at least 20 to 30 mins of foreplay should be enuff to get your motor running...
KY is sold at Walmart, but my fav is ID glide.
You can buy lubricant at CVS, Walgreens, or any other drug store. Stick to water-based, and I would suggest the jelly rather than the liquid because it stays in place better. To tell him you need it, just tell him it's because he's so big. Nothing llike an ego boost for him! Be careful with the warming lubricants. I tried the KY warming, and we had to stop and I had to go wash off the lube because it burned so badly.
Any drugstore and get KY brand. They have choices so get something that interests you. I like the kind that makes your genitals warm.
Dirty Old Guy
err KY works good and just tell him...if youre having sex with him you should be able to tell him anything
Just be honest. Tell him he is so large you need lube. If he cares about you (and wants to be invited back into your bed) he will be happy to apply it.
I like both "Embrace" and "Wet". The Embrace stuff you can get from Amazon. It comes out as a jelly so it sticks to things.
Wet can be bought at your local drugstore. Get the sugar-free stuff and pop it in the microwave for 15 seconds. It's more liquid.
go to an adult store and buy almost anything they have their. they will and can hlep you find what you want. just tell him you need some lube it hurts your are getting dried out. my hubby has no problem using it.
KY brand or AstroGlide work well. The jelly form of lube can get sticky after a while, but I've found that the other can also be a bit difficult because it runs through my fingers easily and drips onto the sheets. I've found it helpful to keep a box of tissues within easy reach for my hands or a washcloth (dry or wet, depends on your bedroom setup).
Foreplay is always a good place to start, but sometimes that just isn't going to do the trick or it would take a month of Sundays. Sometimes different types of birth control seem to cause vaginal dryness. Personally, I've found lube to be a godsend and recommend it to anyone who thinks that it might help them.
As for introducing it to your partner, if he cares about you (and isn't just after meaningless, self-centered sex) then he shouldn't need too much explanation and he should be willing to try something that will make you more interested and into sex (as well as possibly able to have sex more frequently-if you wish).
Good luck!