Wondering if any women have experienced 'zoning out' during sex?!
Question: Am I normal? Nearly every time in the middle of sex I 'zone out' and think about other stuff, like making to do lists or thinking of what to cook for dinner, anything but what I'm actually doing. Before sex and during foreplay I'm interested and actively involved, but once there's penetration I start tuning things out.
I blame some of this on the fact that I've never climaxed during intercourse (only with manual stimulation), so I think of foreplay more as 'my time' and intercourse as 'his time.'
Does this happen to you? And what have you done that works to help you snap out of it and get back into the moment so that you can enjoy (instead of just be done with) sex?
Answers: Am I normal? Nearly every time in the middle of sex I 'zone out' and think about other stuff, like making to do lists or thinking of what to cook for dinner, anything but what I'm actually doing. Before sex and during foreplay I'm interested and actively involved, but once there's penetration I start tuning things out.
I blame some of this on the fact that I've never climaxed during intercourse (only with manual stimulation), so I think of foreplay more as 'my time' and intercourse as 'his time.'
Does this happen to you? And what have you done that works to help you snap out of it and get back into the moment so that you can enjoy (instead of just be done with) sex?
haha, yeah, i think that's completely normal! everyone does it--guys too i suspect!
the key to having an orgasm during intercourse is to try to relax and to really focus on what youre doing. really pay attention to whats going on down there... visualize it in your mind. you'll find that by doing this, you'll be a lot more aroused... and may be able to reach climax without manual stimulation.
but, obviously, sometimes youre going to be more into than other times. i find that i enjoy sex a lot more right before and during menstration--this is because of the hormones.
but anyway, just relax and know that what's happening is normal and nothing to feel bad about.
Mom?
women are zoned out 24/7 you are one of the lucky ones lol and you call men for everything under the sun lmao
"Pink!" she thought. "I think I will paint the bedroom ceiling pink."
you're having sex with the wrong guy. Sorry not trying to be offensive.
I totally zone out all the time...I think that might be a contirbuting factor to my divorce.
I never experenced this until after I relised that I'm not as attracted to my husband as I used to be. Fantize he's Johnny Depp or something sometimes. That helps me!
poor fellow (your partner)
About half of the women I have done
get a new boyfriend
You need to relax and enjoy the moment. There is a time for everything and the bedroom is not the time to think of chores. Just relax and go with it. You will get there.
I have the same problem. I haven't really tried to fix it, I figure I may as well get something done while he's doing his thing. lol. He doesn't even know. (but he's on here...so I guess he knows now....hm....)
Well, the last years of my marriage were like that. When we "zone out" it means we have too much on our minds. One thing I found that helped me stay "in the mood" was to partake in sex talk and to keep switching positions to keep it interesting.
he is doing something rong, don't blame u for zoning out.Maybe get a girl to show you wot u like and then tell the idiot bf
well that doesn't happen to me.
sorry
yeah... kinda weird
look him in the eye
My ex-husband.
When we were breaking up and he promised me to buy me something....lol
So If I don't want to have fun, I don't do nothing with no one now.
it happens to me alot!! but i have climax during intercourse though and i notice that the time that i dont climax during intercourse is when i start zoning out, what i do is try to think about what turns me on about him so i can get back in the mood, and usually when i do dat i get back in da mood and climax,,,hope this helps!
i picture whats going on down there and i start getting turned on again, kinda almost like porn in a way.
I never thought about the women zoning out. make me think that I should be extra loving and more creative to help my women to stay zoned in. So thanks for the question
maybe if you took a more of a hands on approach during intercourse,, i always like it when a woman is willing to help pleasure herself.. my hand doesnt turn that way.. i would sure be put off if i couldnt keep my girls interest during sex, i want her focus on my performance and on the moment not on groceries.. there is other time to think of that.. besides im only up there for like 5 to 10 mins so i cant be that hard for her to stay focused..
my experience
10 years being a man whore
slept with over 60 women
you are completly normal. i do it all the time and one of my friends actually does it the bad she accidently asks questions such as "what time is the party starting tomorrow"? in the middle of sex with her partner needless to say he isnt to happy about her lack of involvement haha
maybe you should try different positions so it is just not the same old boring penetration, im the same as you penetration alone does not work for me i find it very dull..
what i fould helped me stay in the mood was being on top where i have too play an active roll and i find the sex is a lot better as its not just in and out so to speak :)
good luck
I FALL ASLEEP he he
since you know this maybe you should try harder to be more involved.. this only happens to me when im under alot of stress and my mind is all over the place but during this time i cant do anything because im soo distracted!
well it sounds like your mate doesnt do what you like, therefore your bored and so you zone out. let him know that he is not fullfilling you.
http://www.femaleorgasmsecrets.com/
http://www.whitelotuseast.com/FemaleOrga...
try these two... also google or Yahoo! the phrase female orgasm... i've read somewhere that climax comes only or mostly with manual stimulation. so i suggest that you concentrate on him and ask him to do stuff you'd enjoy like oral or to touch you there while he's doing his stuff...
maybe climb on top and grind harder take control
Sounds to me like your partner is not considering your needs but just his own. Women do just exactly what you do: focus on all the things they have to do. Have you ever put off sex at night until you have the dishes done, the laundry folded and put away, made lunches for the children for the next day, etc. Men focus on the sex act; women focus on all the other things they have to do. That is why many women are not "present" when they are having sex.
Another explanation could be that sometime in your youth you were molested. Most women who have been molested (by adults) as children have a huge problem staying in the moment when trying to have intercourse. You could seek counseling or ask another family member. Because the molestation was so terrible, you had to zone out to endure the pain and terror of it. And of course you were told to never tell anyone.
It seems, from my experiences, and the people that I've talked to about similar things, that it's a very normal thing to happen. However, if it troubles you, you could always get "him" to manually stimulate you during intercourse, or try other things while he's inside you. Nibbles on the back while in doggy-style, fingers down the sides while in missionary, him pulling out and performing cunnilingus every now and then, or my favorite, a doggy-style clitoral 'reach-around' while he's pumping. I've never had a girl tell me to stop, and I've had a few even be able to squirt from it. All in all, there is little reason for you to be lying there while getting no pleasure out of it. Either train the guy your with or find another one :P.
Oh, but there are a great many women who can't have an orgasm during intercourse, at least that's what studies say. However, remember, for your orgasm a lot of it is mental. When I space out during sex I've gone for hours at a time just steadily going at it without being able to climax. It's fun for the girl, but just aggravating and tiring for me, so I feel your pain a little there.
Alright then, best of luck!
Hell no. I just read some horny novels....and get my self into the mood. Or think about it...some ...or any fantasy..to get myself into the mood.
Yes, you're normal, it does happen to everyone at some point ...but "nearly every time"? -- Now that's just not 'ok'!
If you're not looking at intercourse as 'your time' too then it makes sense that your mind would start to wander...especially if he's taking abit too long.
BUT ----you need to be enjoying the whole process!
From beginning to end it needs to be about BOTH of you!
I know that you say that you do not climax during intercourse so, let's start (& end!) there cuz I think that's the crux of the problem (and it does happen to far too many women!)...
When he's penetrating you is he rubbing against your clitoris at all? His motions should be stimulating you AND him. If not, have you tried getting on top and moving to a pleasing momentum for YOURSELF (and thereby him in the process)? How about 'doggie style' with his or (better yet!) YOUR hand stimulating your clitoris? My favorite is the flat 'doggie style'... you on your belly, hands cupped around yourself for stimulation, and him on top of your back and penetrating you... this way he gets 'his' and you get 'yours' but you get to get there together :)
Just some thoughts!
Good luck, take care.
Stevie