He wants me to take the morning after pill, and I don't.?!
Question: My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year. I'm 26, he's 25. We have good jobs and are basiclly your avarge adult. We normally are very good with using condoms. But Sat night he didn't. Now he wants me to take the morning after pill, and I don't want to. If I don't take it will he resent me? If I did get pg. it's not just my baby. (I've taken the pill before) But I just don't think it's right when you are in a loving, adult relationship.
Back story: I've had the conversation with him, telling him I wanted to have a baby, but I knew now isn't the right time. (we would like to be married and plan a baby) But I told him I wouldn't have an abortion, because I was old enough to take care of my resposiblities and because I wanted one. Anyway, he knew all of this. Is the moring after pill an abortion. I mean once conception happens, all your baby's genes are maped out. what would you do?
Answers: My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year. I'm 26, he's 25. We have good jobs and are basiclly your avarge adult. We normally are very good with using condoms. But Sat night he didn't. Now he wants me to take the morning after pill, and I don't want to. If I don't take it will he resent me? If I did get pg. it's not just my baby. (I've taken the pill before) But I just don't think it's right when you are in a loving, adult relationship.
Back story: I've had the conversation with him, telling him I wanted to have a baby, but I knew now isn't the right time. (we would like to be married and plan a baby) But I told him I wouldn't have an abortion, because I was old enough to take care of my resposiblities and because I wanted one. Anyway, he knew all of this. Is the moring after pill an abortion. I mean once conception happens, all your baby's genes are maped out. what would you do?
Whoa. A lot of issues here. First of all, why didn't he use a condom? Did he just not feel like it, and is therefore leaving it up to you to be the responsible party? Keep in mind that his opinion stops at your skin. Anything inside your skin is up to you. If you want this hypothetical baby, and don't care if he leaves you to raise it alone, then you can do what you want, regardless of whether he'll resent you. I mean, will you resent him if YOU do what HE wants? I'm unclear why, given that you guys have talked about this and seemed on the same page and all, you would run into this problem. Does it demonstrate some fatal miscommunication between you? Like an unconscious desire on your part to have a baby, and therefore yo're hoping that becoming pregnant will force the issue? Or irresponsibility on his part, in which he's fine with leaving all the birth control decisions up to you, as long as end result is no baby? But he doesn't take upon himself any of the responsibility to make sure that doesn't happen? I would say that the future of your relationship hinges on your ability to resolve this fundamental disagreement, which will reccur throughout your sex lives together. And he needs to stop waffling about an issue that is so important.
As for whether or not it's an abortion, well, that depends on your definition. It causes you to lose your uterine lining. So therefore the theoretical fertilized egg, which it doesn't harm at all, can't implant. So you're never pregnant. But you're doing something to prevent the pregnancy from occurring, and there is a fertilized egg involved. But this happens most months of your fertile life, if you're regularly having sex--that is, an egg is fertilized and then it doesn't implant and the lining sloughs off. But no one thinks about those as abortions, or lost babies, or miscarriages. In any case, do you think it's right to bring a child into the world knowing that it will have parents who are fighting? Or knowing that it has the job of keeping the parents together?
If you don`t want to take it, then don`t!
You have to think about what you would have to be going through if you would! Don`t let anyone talk you in to violating your own body if you have the slightest doubt!
Are you prepared to be a single mother? If he doesn't want a child and you do and get pregnant - do you think he will stay around?
That's great for a child
take the pill. you are being unrealistic here. you two need to discuss what you both want from this relationship. sounds like you both want different things and unready for baby, as he doesnt want baby (isnt this ibvious) you need to decide if yiu want to stay or find someone who wants children when you do. do not trick him this way, the morning after pill is not abortion. I would take the pill.
id say its up to you! dont take it if you dont want to, if he was that concerned about not having one then he should have been move careful. do what you want lady, its your body & your most likely to bring up this child for the majority of its life.
dont let him dominate you! if he loves you then he should respect your desicion, leave it up to fate. x
good luck!
it's already too late for you to take the morning after pill. He shouldn't get angry at you if you decide not to ake the pill. Sex takes two people and as he also chose not to use a condom, he should also face the consequences. Depending on how far along in your cycle you are, you should be alright pregnancy wise.
To me, the morning after pill isn't an abortion. Even at that point, you may not even be pregnant. You may have nothing inside you and taking it will do nothing. Also. You may not even carry the baby full term. You may miscarry. Anything can happen.
In my opinion, using the pill is better than bringing a child into the world with a family who isn't ready for it.
It isn't an abortion - it prevents implantation. Like your period.
no the morning after pill is not an abortion because it actually takes a few days for conception to happen. i really don't know what to tell you because i wouldn't want you to be raising a baby by yourself because he didn't want to keep it. you have to make a decision within 72 hours though. good luck with whatever you choose
you cant just do that what if he leaves you and ur baby alone? its his choice to and you should have used protection ur obviously not mature enough to have a child anyways
do what you want....but if you do get pregnant and he didn't want it, you sure as heck better not go after him for child support. He made his intentions clear in the beginning. If you wnat to go at it alone...good luck to you. I would rather you didn't though, there are enough people on welfare already...
If you were saying that you want to take it and he didnt, I would give you the same answer.
Its your body nobody can tell you what to do with it.
From what you say you are more than ready to have a baby.
But can you handle it by yourself in case he doesn't step up?
Did you ask him if he was gonna resent you if you dont take the pill?
Did he say that if you are actually pregnant he would not be there for you or the baby?
That's what you have to talk about.
Those are the questions you need to be asking.
To me an abortion is when a pregnancy ends either naturally or provoked.
If by the end of this dillema you are not pregnant I suggest you get some Birth Control get tested with your boyfriend for STD's and stop worriyng. That's of course if you both decide you are not ready to have a baby.
It's always your choice to decided on what you want to do. But both of you should discuss every aspect of the "what if" just so both of you are clear and both know what to expect if you both become pregnant.
You have 72 hours from the time you had intercourse to take the morning after pill and the longer you wait the less effective it is so please keep that in mind. The morning after pill is a large dosage of the hormones found in birth control pills and it definitely is not an abortion in my opinion. As someone previously said you don't even know if you would actually become pregnant or not. With that being said the decision is yours but you have to think about ALL of the factors. I would hate for you to be faced with a much bigger decision down the road if you do become pregnant and he tries to convince you to have an abortion. If I were you I would take the pill (immediately) and then reevaluate my relationship. As others have said it's clear that you guys want different things and this is a great time to see where your relationship is going. Good luck and I hope this helps!