Is it common for married women to lose their urges of sex with time?!


Question: I have been married for two years already. We are in our early 20's and at first, we would make love about 4 times a week. Now it's only about once a week. She has anemia and she is always tired. I always argue about us not having sex often, and she is always saying that it's cause of her anemia. I believe she could use that as an excuse and I think she has lost her interest in sex. (I haven't) Is it common for this to happen within a marriage. I love her and I only want to be with her, but it sucks to know that our sex life isn't what it used to be. And yes, I do try to make it interesting every now and then. So what do you ladies think. Has this happened to you, or are you in the same position as my wife? What do I have to do? Do I just accept it.


Answers: I have been married for two years already. We are in our early 20's and at first, we would make love about 4 times a week. Now it's only about once a week. She has anemia and she is always tired. I always argue about us not having sex often, and she is always saying that it's cause of her anemia. I believe she could use that as an excuse and I think she has lost her interest in sex. (I haven't) Is it common for this to happen within a marriage. I love her and I only want to be with her, but it sucks to know that our sex life isn't what it used to be. And yes, I do try to make it interesting every now and then. So what do you ladies think. Has this happened to you, or are you in the same position as my wife? What do I have to do? Do I just accept it.

It happens, and if you make an issue of it you'll make her resent you, and it'll get worse!

Is she taking iron supplements? Anemia does make you tired! Feed her some red meat!

Romance her WITHOUT sex or the mention of it! When your wife doesn't feel the pressure she'll want you more often! I know when my husband is after me constantly I get mad and start telling him no. Hounding a woman for sex can be a big turn-off!

yup, happens all the time

Husbands, boyfriends, or etc. wear us out. Of course we lose our desire for sex.

There is nothing that eradicates a womans sex drive faster than wedding cake.

You cant beat it all the time, then you'll get tired off it

Well, if your wife has anemia that is a pretty good excuse. She probably doesn't have the energy to have sex. My advice is just to accept it and not make her feel so bad about not being able to perform for you. It will eventually cause resentment towards you.

Happens way too often -- and both genders. I am part of a support group, as a matter of fact. If you'd like more info, email me.

I have to ask why she doesn't get treatment for her anemia? I had an issue with it, got treatment, and now I don't have it any more. It made me a little tired when I had it, but never too tired for intimacy. Sounds like she needs to push a doctor into helping her. There are long-term effects from anemia. Does she know what type of anemia she has? Maybe this article will help you: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anemia

Its not that we loose the urge its because its lost the excitement. Not saying that your wife has lost interest in you but when you get married sex is readily available and always there. There is no tension, no chase. Our lives are extremely busy and we seem not to make time for sex.
Treat your sex life like you did when you were dating. Go on date night.. just the two of you.. turn off cell phones, go to the movies and a nice dinner and pretend that you are dating still

And speak to her about it more. Perhaps if things don't change perhaps counselling will give it that boost

Yes, it's completly normal (that's why monogamy and the illusion restrictive socities and religions expect from biological units usually don't work). A male's testesterone hormone levels (which influences libido - sex drive) are 4-6 times higher than that of a female. A female's libido is not only restricted by her hormone levels, other factors play into it in a restrictive way (if you two have small children, lots of stress and her anemia is certainly a big factor, and many other things).

Over time, your hormone levels will "adjust" (= lower) or hers might increase (once the children grow and her chores decrease). I'm sorry becaue you two are too newly wed to have this crises already, but if it does affect you, I sugest that you talk to her openly about how you feel and what you'd want. Also, check out some self-help books ("men are from mars, women from venus". Good luck!

yes it happens sorry to say but its true

Well i have been married for 20 years and it hasn't changed that much for us. we gone from 5 to 6 times a week to 4 to 5 times a week and we are in our 40's. So you cant categorize all women the same

My husband and I have been married for 31 and a half years. Our sex life is great! BUT, like marriage it has it's ups and downs. Find out what her love language is and fill her love tank and that will help. Encourage her to get help with the anemia also, it is very draining. Find time to snuggle with her without the pressure of having to do something beyond that. Hang in there because it does get better if you stick with it!





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