Sex Life Trouble - What can I do to help myself 'get in the mood'?!
Question: Sex Life Trouble - What can I do to help myself 'get in the mood'!?
Me and my husband have been sexually active with each other for 4 years now!. Every time, except for maybe the first week, it starts off as being pretty unpleasant for me!. I don't know what the problem could be, all I know is that I don't get 'wet' no matter how turned-on or 'in the mood' I am!. I'll stay dry, which usually winds up in me ripping a little bit, and its very painful!. I even bleed a bit, but not profusely just for the duration!.
It only lasts a minute or so, the rest of the time I can't really feel anything painful there for obvious reasons!.!. but I'm pretty sore afterwards, and that 1 minute or so of tearing is enough to make me not want to participate!.
I've used lube before, but it seems like overkill when you're in the middle of it!. That and the kinds I used were really sticky and gooey and it's gross to get on your hands!.
Does anyone have any suggestions!? :[ Help my sex life please!Www@Answer-Health@Com
It only lasts a minute or so, the rest of the time I can't really feel anything painful there for obvious reasons!.!. but I'm pretty sore afterwards, and that 1 minute or so of tearing is enough to make me not want to participate!.
I've used lube before, but it seems like overkill when you're in the middle of it!. That and the kinds I used were really sticky and gooey and it's gross to get on your hands!.
Does anyone have any suggestions!? :[ Help my sex life please!Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
oh, honey!. sounds like you need to light some candles, listen to some music!.!.!. or watch some porn, read some erotica!.!.!. anything that gets YOU going!. if you're lucky enough to live near a woman-positive sex shop like good vibrations or babes in toyland, definitely give that a go!. these spaces will not disrespect you and they're happy to answer any questions you might have!. take you husband, take a friend--or just take yourself! and definitely don't have sex if you're not in the mood--you have to actually want it to actually WANT it!. =) and it can cause you even more problems in the long run if you force yourself to go along with it just because you feel you "have to!."Www@Answer-Health@Com
are you on hormonal birth control!? they have a long-term permanent effect on your sex drive!. maybe consider getting off it, if that is the case!.
if you're not on anything, then maybe you just need to be comfortable with yourself, and find something that turns you on, and fantasize while having sex, or watch porn before hand!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
if you're not on anything, then maybe you just need to be comfortable with yourself, and find something that turns you on, and fantasize while having sex, or watch porn before hand!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
just a question! are you on birth control pills!?
they are often the cause of vaginal dryness and lessened sex drive - if you are, maybe as your doctor about it, see if you can change pills, if you aren't then im really not sure!
it may just be a phase, try and spice things up, do what turns YOU on!
like someone else said, maybe visit a good female sex shop!. (:Www@Answer-Health@Com
they are often the cause of vaginal dryness and lessened sex drive - if you are, maybe as your doctor about it, see if you can change pills, if you aren't then im really not sure!
it may just be a phase, try and spice things up, do what turns YOU on!
like someone else said, maybe visit a good female sex shop!. (:Www@Answer-Health@Com
The Depo-Provera could definitely be monkeying with you being dry!. but that's different from being "in the mood"!. So if your problem is that YOU are all into the idea of having sex but you're still dry, then!.!.!.as icky as lube is, you may want to still try sucking it up and using it!. I don't understand what you mean by "overkill"; and as for the problem with the kinds that you used!? So, just find another kind that you like better!. (And if you don't like getting it on your hands!? Have your HUSBAND put it on HIS hands and then he rubs it onto you, so you work it into the foreplay!.)
But if your issue is that you just don't feel like having sex yourself either, that's a different issue!. But it sounds like it's more a matter of you want to, but you're dry!. Either lots of foreplay, or learning to love lube, is the best bet!.
And I know of whence I speak -- I had to have an ovary removed when I was 26, and I've had trouble staying wet ever since!. But a well-timed squirt of lube takes care of that!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
But if your issue is that you just don't feel like having sex yourself either, that's a different issue!. But it sounds like it's more a matter of you want to, but you're dry!. Either lots of foreplay, or learning to love lube, is the best bet!.
And I know of whence I speak -- I had to have an ovary removed when I was 26, and I've had trouble staying wet ever since!. But a well-timed squirt of lube takes care of that!.Www@Answer-Health@Com