How is rape defined, these days?!
Question: How is rape defined, these days!?
I am 19-years-old!. Almost exactly three years ago, when I was 16, I was dating a guy!. I was still a virgin, and we'd been dating for about a year but I still wasn't ready to have sex, though I'd done almost everything else!. Well, to make a long story short, one day he told me that he really wanted to have sex with me!. I told him no, and he was kissing me, telling me how much he loved me!. You know, typical BS!. He kept begging me, and I told him no constantly!. But he told me that if I loved him, I would!. So I started feeling SO guilty!. I so badly didn't want to have sex with him, but out of guilt I finally said 'fine' and he had sex with me!. Afterward he didn't say anything to me, we got in his car, and had a silent ride back to my house!.
I know it was three years ago!.
Since then I've changed a lot, but truly wonder if this was rape or not!. I hate thinking about it, because I don't want to seem like I'm seeking attention or anything, and I sometimes feel guilty for even considering the fact that it could have been rape!.!.!. I don't know!. Any insight would be great!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I know it was three years ago!.
Since then I've changed a lot, but truly wonder if this was rape or not!. I hate thinking about it, because I don't want to seem like I'm seeking attention or anything, and I sometimes feel guilty for even considering the fact that it could have been rape!.!.!. I don't know!. Any insight would be great!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
When I read your response I felt a mixture of anger and sadness!. Yes, yes yes of course this was rape!. Don't you dare let anyone tell you otherwise!.
You were coerced!. Manipulated!. Made to feel guilty!. And then you made a choice that you wouldn't have otherwise if this guy hadn't done everything he thought he could to get what he wanted from you!. You know what the kicker was!? What *convinces* me that you were raped!? The silence!. Neither one of you said a word after it was all over!. No words were spoken and yet you know there were volumes left unsaid between you!.
He knows what he did was wrong!. He *has* to know!. And so do you!. You know you were violated!. It doesn't matter how long you've been with someone!. If you have to feel guilty about making that choice to have sex with someone, that is called rape!.
And screw the legal definition of rape!. That has no bearing on what you're asking!. Unless you decide to press charges!. Which would be entirely up to you!.
I know because it happened to me!. And while it was happening it's like I wasn't there!. I was off somewhere else, even though I was staring up at the ceiling hoping that it would end soon!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
You were coerced!. Manipulated!. Made to feel guilty!. And then you made a choice that you wouldn't have otherwise if this guy hadn't done everything he thought he could to get what he wanted from you!. You know what the kicker was!? What *convinces* me that you were raped!? The silence!. Neither one of you said a word after it was all over!. No words were spoken and yet you know there were volumes left unsaid between you!.
He knows what he did was wrong!. He *has* to know!. And so do you!. You know you were violated!. It doesn't matter how long you've been with someone!. If you have to feel guilty about making that choice to have sex with someone, that is called rape!.
And screw the legal definition of rape!. That has no bearing on what you're asking!. Unless you decide to press charges!. Which would be entirely up to you!.
I know because it happened to me!. And while it was happening it's like I wasn't there!. I was off somewhere else, even though I was staring up at the ceiling hoping that it would end soon!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
You said fine!. Regret and peer pressure do not constitute rape!.
This is not defending anyone's behavior, but you need to be very careful what you call a crime, because it is unjust to accuse a man of rape unless it is anything but full on rape!. Nagging is not a crime, and if you ultimately allow sex to happen because of nagging, it's your own fault, you could have walked away!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
This is not defending anyone's behavior, but you need to be very careful what you call a crime, because it is unjust to accuse a man of rape unless it is anything but full on rape!. Nagging is not a crime, and if you ultimately allow sex to happen because of nagging, it's your own fault, you could have walked away!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Rape is sexual actions done to you without your conscent!. If you are forced or threatened or coerced or made incapacitated by alcohol or drugs, that is rape!.
His not letting it go until you gave in and had sex wasn't rape but it was certainly wrong!. And I think it is very very common because I have heard of similar experiences from Many girls!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
His not letting it go until you gave in and had sex wasn't rape but it was certainly wrong!. And I think it is very very common because I have heard of similar experiences from Many girls!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
No means no, honey!. In the eyes of the law "OK fine" cannot mean anything else but consent and isnt rape!.!.!.!.!. although I fully appreciate what you are saying and why you feel like you might as well have been raped!.
Bear in mind that rape is a criminal act and therefore must be capable of a strict definition!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Bear in mind that rape is a criminal act and therefore must be capable of a strict definition!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I think so!. If you didn't really want to, and he knew this, it was!. I was in a situation not exactly similar( the guy in my case did not listen to anything i had to say, and was more violent), but any case in which you did not want to is rape!. If you need someone who understands how you feel, email me at redrosesRosalie@yahoo!.comWww@Answer-Health@Com
If you stuck with the 'no', then it'd be considered date rape, regardless of what state you're in!. But since you said 'fine' (although it was due to pressure from him), techincally would be considered consent and would be hard to prove otherwise!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
You were coerced into giving your consent under emotional duress!. Anything other than a loud, clear, and enthusiastic "yes" is rape!.
Talk to someone!. Find a counselor who you can sit down with and fully come to terms with what happened!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Talk to someone!. Find a counselor who you can sit down with and fully come to terms with what happened!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Yes, you were raped because it was not consensual!.
Even though you said "fine", he forced you to do it!.
It's called "date rape" and very common!.
Read the book "I Never Called It Rape" by Robin Warsaw!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Even though you said "fine", he forced you to do it!.
It's called "date rape" and very common!.
Read the book "I Never Called It Rape" by Robin Warsaw!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
How old was your boyfriend at the time!? If you were around the same age then he pressured you into sex but did not rape you!. If he was over 18 it could be statutory, if he was 21 or older it was definitely!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
no because
1!. You let him
2!. You would be resisting for it to be rape
3!. Rapists kill you
but he could be raping you mentallyWww@Answer-Health@Com
1!. You let him
2!. You would be resisting for it to be rape
3!. Rapists kill you
but he could be raping you mentallyWww@Answer-Health@Com
Not rape, you agreed, even if you didn't want to!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
no because you agreed to it!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
by the law, I would have to say no!.!.!.sorry honey!.
but you need to stop dwelling on this!. you need to talk to a counselor because even if the law would not convict him, what he did was wrong!. you said no and just because you gave in doesn't make it right!. he's an a$$!. talk to someone and move past this!. rape isn't always violent as some people believe!.!.!.though it does have to be violent in order for him to be convicted of rape!. I myself was a victim by my own ex-husband who was my husband at the time!. we were already having problems, on the verge of divorce!. he used the sex as a power tool, as a way to devalue, overpower, control, to make me submissive and to strip me of me!. I kept saying no, he kept on till I finally gave in just to get him off me!. no, I would not be able to convict him of rape, but it was a rape on my person, on me, on who I am!. if it leaves you feeling like sh*t after, crying, curled up in the fetal position even though it wasn't violent, then yes, it's a rape on your emotions and your soul!.
so, by law, no it's not rape!.!.!.but, by morals, integrity, and all the other things that make us good civilized people, then by all means, classify it as a personal rape!. the fact that you're still thinking about it 3 years later says a whole lot!. seek a professional, a counselor, they'll be able to help you sort through it!. good luck and many blessings that you'll get through this and move on!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
but you need to stop dwelling on this!. you need to talk to a counselor because even if the law would not convict him, what he did was wrong!. you said no and just because you gave in doesn't make it right!. he's an a$$!. talk to someone and move past this!. rape isn't always violent as some people believe!.!.!.though it does have to be violent in order for him to be convicted of rape!. I myself was a victim by my own ex-husband who was my husband at the time!. we were already having problems, on the verge of divorce!. he used the sex as a power tool, as a way to devalue, overpower, control, to make me submissive and to strip me of me!. I kept saying no, he kept on till I finally gave in just to get him off me!. no, I would not be able to convict him of rape, but it was a rape on my person, on me, on who I am!. if it leaves you feeling like sh*t after, crying, curled up in the fetal position even though it wasn't violent, then yes, it's a rape on your emotions and your soul!.
so, by law, no it's not rape!.!.!.but, by morals, integrity, and all the other things that make us good civilized people, then by all means, classify it as a personal rape!. the fact that you're still thinking about it 3 years later says a whole lot!. seek a professional, a counselor, they'll be able to help you sort through it!. good luck and many blessings that you'll get through this and move on!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Rape is not sex!. it's assault!. It belittles the person, it's cruel, disgusting, and should be punished by castration!. There is nothing worse then stripping someone's dignity by turning something as beautiful as sex into an ugly act of violence!.
According to some, our society has been built up by men in a way that all women feel worthless and the only way to have any value is to serve the mighty male by having sex with him!. Since the oppressive way which men have created out society forces women to have sex in order to have any worth, all sex is rape!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
According to some, our society has been built up by men in a way that all women feel worthless and the only way to have any value is to serve the mighty male by having sex with him!. Since the oppressive way which men have created out society forces women to have sex in order to have any worth, all sex is rape!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
No!. Though he did manage to coerce you into sex, he did not use threats or force you to have sex with him!. Ultimately, you willingly chose to have sex with him, whether you felt like it or not!. However, depending on state laws, it could be considered statutory rape (underage sex)!.
edit - @ Miniko How you feel after you have sex does not determine whether or not the action was rape!. You may feel used or violated, but that still does not constitute rape!. The legal definition of rape is using force or threats to get sex from the victim!. Your feelings will not convict somebody in a court of law!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
edit - @ Miniko How you feel after you have sex does not determine whether or not the action was rape!. You may feel used or violated, but that still does not constitute rape!. The legal definition of rape is using force or threats to get sex from the victim!. Your feelings will not convict somebody in a court of law!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Different states have different laws!. In most states the legal age is NOT 18, in many states it is 15, but the other person has to be under 21!.
It would depend on your state, but i would not consider this rape, especially since he did not psychically force you!.
edit - @ Miniko, are you retarted or something!? You say what he did was rape, then you say you're not going by the legal definition of rape!. That kinda goes against the point of having having dictionaries to define words!.
\Www@Answer-Health@Com
It would depend on your state, but i would not consider this rape, especially since he did not psychically force you!.
edit - @ Miniko, are you retarted or something!? You say what he did was rape, then you say you're not going by the legal definition of rape!. That kinda goes against the point of having having dictionaries to define words!.
\Www@Answer-Health@Com
By law I would say no as you did agree to it!. But as he pressured you into it, to you it will seem like you have been!. Rape is not always violent and aggressive!. If both people are not wanting it it is rape!. But I am not sure if this would stand up in court!.
When I was 17 I had been sleeping with my BF for 6 months!. But one time I did not want to and he really really did!. In the end I could not say no any more and just let him do his bit!. Since then I have looked on that as rape as I was not wanting to!. But I know what you mean, just because you are in a relationship it doe not mean that rape does not happen!.
A lot of people do not think of as rape as losing your virginity!. As it was not consenting!. So try and think off your first time consenting as your first time of sex!.
I hope this helps!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
When I was 17 I had been sleeping with my BF for 6 months!. But one time I did not want to and he really really did!. In the end I could not say no any more and just let him do his bit!. Since then I have looked on that as rape as I was not wanting to!. But I know what you mean, just because you are in a relationship it doe not mean that rape does not happen!.
A lot of people do not think of as rape as losing your virginity!. As it was not consenting!. So try and think off your first time consenting as your first time of sex!.
I hope this helps!. Www@Answer-Health@Com