My boyfriend doesnt understand my pain?!
Question: My boyfriend doesnt understand my pain!?
Last year in the summer, I had a miscarriage with my ex boyfriends baby after raping me!. He dumped me a few days later!. A month later i got to know my boyfriend at the moment!.!. Im not going to go into full story but when im down and crying, don't get me wrong, he does give me a hug but he just tells me to stop crying over and over and in the end he gets quite stressed at me!. I try to stop crying but its hard and i try to explain that to him!. Sometimes when im crying he grabs my chin really hard and gets stressed because im not looking at him!.!. Hes done alot of things to hurt me in this realationship too!. And at the end of it all its always me that ends up being the one to say sorry
What can i say to him to make him understand the pain im going through!?
please help
no horrible answers please i really cant deal with reading them at the moment
thanksWww@Answer-Health@Com
What can i say to him to make him understand the pain im going through!?
please help
no horrible answers please i really cant deal with reading them at the moment
thanksWww@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
You are in grief!. It is important to acknowledge and honor this within yourself!. This is a pivitol moment for you, offering an opportunity to heal at a very deep, significant and lasting level that could change your life permanently for the better!. The alternative is to continue your patterns as the violence with escalate and you will lose more than a boyfriend!.
Currently, you are making choices based on what you know, what is familiar and comfortable for you!. When we are in pain, we fail to see the warning signs, as well as the opportunities to change!. I suggest you get courageous and face yourself in the mirror!. Tell yourself you are beautiful and an incredible person!. Seek answers, set higher standards, and recognize that courage is about re-framing what is ahead of you, believing with all your heart that is it nothing but abundance, and claim this future!. It is not fair for you to continue being in a relationship right now!. You are unable to give love until you find love for yourself!. The person you have picked to get involved with is just another version of the last guy, and unless you get smart and commit to yourself and that wonderful future, you will continue to go on the self-destruction path!.
Give your head a shake, and allow yourself to heal and make lasting changes!. Love yourself first!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Currently, you are making choices based on what you know, what is familiar and comfortable for you!. When we are in pain, we fail to see the warning signs, as well as the opportunities to change!. I suggest you get courageous and face yourself in the mirror!. Tell yourself you are beautiful and an incredible person!. Seek answers, set higher standards, and recognize that courage is about re-framing what is ahead of you, believing with all your heart that is it nothing but abundance, and claim this future!. It is not fair for you to continue being in a relationship right now!. You are unable to give love until you find love for yourself!. The person you have picked to get involved with is just another version of the last guy, and unless you get smart and commit to yourself and that wonderful future, you will continue to go on the self-destruction path!.
Give your head a shake, and allow yourself to heal and make lasting changes!. Love yourself first!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I am sorry, you don't want to hear this, but if a boyfriend is incapable of being supportive, then its probably time to end the relationship!. I used to date someone like this and it is only years later that I realised I should have dumped him at the first sign of insensitive behaviour! You can probably get support for your grief from a counsellor e!.g!. at a Well Woman Clinic!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Dump him and seek counseling!. You are attracted, for some reason, to men who are abusive!. Doesn't sound like you should be sorry for anything!. Talk to your OB and request a referral to a psychologist!. There is a lot for you to work out and he is not helping!. You didn't do anything wrong!. Make the appointment with your OB right away!. That is what he/she is there for!. You should be followed closely after a miscarriage anyway and it sounds like you are dealing with depression on top of everything else!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Hope this don't hurt you BUT i don't think this boyfriend is any good for you!. You seem to have gone through a lot already and you do not need this from him!. Why don't you break it off and have a bit of me time with your friend and not a relationship, when you have healed emotionally you will be stronger and ready for a fresh relationship!. Please don't take s!hit of the fella you don't need it wright know Good LuckWww@Answer-Health@Com
Stop playing the victim, leave this guy, he's not the one for you, pick yourself up and get on with the rest of your life!. You do have a choice, nobody can treat you the way your current boyfriend is without your permission!. Stop trying to save it, it is NOT a healthy relationship!. Seek counselling for the trauma you went through last year and stop wasting your energy on a guy who doesn't help or support you and makes you feel sad even more!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Emily, it sounds like you need to be alone and sort your life out right now hun, it is a hard thing to go through and your man should be understanding BUT this was before him you have to try to get over it and not let it get in the way of a new relationship, he sounds like a jerk either way!.!. Take some time now for you and start over later!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Your current boyfriend sounds awful, I'm sorry!. He sounds like he is abusive!. I'm no angel; I'm an average guy -- but I can't imagine getting upset with someone for crying over that, much less grabbing their face and making them look at me!. That's a serious red flag!. You should get away from him, talk to somebody who can help you deal with your feelings more effectively and THEN go find another boyfriend!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
You're bf is frustrated because he doesn't know what to do to help you!. He doesn't like seeing you like this!. You could try telling him not to say anything, just give you a hug!. But if it is happening often, i'm afraid everyone gets a bit tired of a 'misery guts'!.
Go see your Dr and see about counselling and perhaps a course in antidepressantsWww@Answer-Health@Com
Go see your Dr and see about counselling and perhaps a course in antidepressantsWww@Answer-Health@Com
it is a complicated situation!.!.!.can i ask you to forget your past!? This is crucial before you move in to any new relationship!. you need to let go of what happened before!. because that unpleasant memory still haunts you, you are associating that pain with the pain that you are feeling now!. your boyfriend seems a little impatient but he can't be entirely blamed if you have come into a relationship with him with extra baggage!.!.!.take some time out and let your wounds heal first!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
Why are you still with him!? You don't need this!. It seems like you have low self-esteem, but I am telling you that you can do better than this, and you deserve more!. Fact!. Put yourself first, and get rid of him!. Love is a fickle thing but someone who loves wouldn't do anything to hurt you!. I'm sorry to hear that you're in this situation!. I hope this helps xWww@Answer-Health@Com
HONESTLY!. You don't need to be with someone like that!. I am sorry if that isn't what you want to hear!. My husband would never put his hands on me at all!. I USED TO BE IN VIOLENT RELATIONSHIPS WAY WORSE!. YOU THINK THAT THIS IS NORMAL BUT IT'S NOT!. YOU NEED TO GET YOURSELF TOGETHER AND REALIZE YOUR TRUE LOVE IS OUT THERE WAITING FOR YOU!. SOMEONE WHO IS CONSIDERATE OF YOUR FEELINGS AND WOULD NEVER HURT YOU!. DON'T LET THIS DRAG OUT IT IS JUST GOING TO GET WORSE!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
I thinks is would be very difficult for any man to understand something like this!. He probably does not know how to react!. That is not his fault!.
Perhaps you should get proper help!. If you go to counselling, invite him to go with you so he realises how you feel!.
Its not fair to expect him to resolve, what is a very serious problem!. You need professional help!.
Good luckWww@Answer-Health@Com
Perhaps you should get proper help!. If you go to counselling, invite him to go with you so he realises how you feel!.
Its not fair to expect him to resolve, what is a very serious problem!. You need professional help!.
Good luckWww@Answer-Health@Com
So sorry to hear that!. Have you told anyone!?
It sounds like you could do with some help :(!. in my opinion talk to him one more time about this and if he doesnt understand i would leave him and move on!.
i hope this comment doesnt upset you by saying leave him!
i really hope your ok :)xWww@Answer-Health@Com
It sounds like you could do with some help :(!. in my opinion talk to him one more time about this and if he doesnt understand i would leave him and move on!.
i hope this comment doesnt upset you by saying leave him!
i really hope your ok :)xWww@Answer-Health@Com
Be strong!. If he is giving you so much pain , leave him!. If a person cant give you happiness, he has no right to make your life so miserable!. IT would be a very hard decision, but later you will thank god for this!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
what you really need is to get shut of your present b/f and have a few months free of any relationship worries, you should also consider some counselling for your previous traumas in your life!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Why are you with him if he's so horrible!? Women can be independent without a man nowadays as it sounds as if you need time before another relationship!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
leave him and find a better one Www@Answer-Health@Com
You have been through intense emotional experiences and friends and family are usually unable to provide the support needed to overcome such pain!. They are too close and it is too hard for them to find that either they are not able to "cure" things, or indeed they find it just too painful themselves!.
DO seek some counselling from the agencies that specialise in either rape or miscarriages!. This will really help you long-term!.
It is concerning that your current boyfriend "grabs your chin" - this is domestic abuse and should not be happening!. Either he changes or you get out!.
I wish you all the best, the pain may seem too much at times, but with support from a trained counsellor you will be able to feel more comfortable inside!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
DO seek some counselling from the agencies that specialise in either rape or miscarriages!. This will really help you long-term!.
It is concerning that your current boyfriend "grabs your chin" - this is domestic abuse and should not be happening!. Either he changes or you get out!.
I wish you all the best, the pain may seem too much at times, but with support from a trained counsellor you will be able to feel more comfortable inside!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
if you dont want horrible answers then you should not ask such question here!.
but the answer is clear out!.!.!.!.what has this guy that you stay with!?!?
he raped you,he hurts you,he doesnt understand you!.!.!.so why at all should you stay with such a guy!?!?!? seems you like to be tortured!.!.!.!.some people are like that because they think its the only chance of their life to be in love !.!.!.!.but no!.!.!.!.there is always someone better outside!.!.!.!.though it may take longer time to find him!.!.!.!.
i would suggest that dont even try to tell him he pains you!.!.!.just break up!.!.!.or suffer if you want to satisfy yourself that one day he will be good to you,which he will never!. up to you!.!.!.
sorry,the answers is harsh!.!.!.but is a fact!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
but the answer is clear out!.!.!.!.what has this guy that you stay with!?!?
he raped you,he hurts you,he doesnt understand you!.!.!.so why at all should you stay with such a guy!?!?!? seems you like to be tortured!.!.!.!.some people are like that because they think its the only chance of their life to be in love !.!.!.!.but no!.!.!.!.there is always someone better outside!.!.!.!.though it may take longer time to find him!.!.!.!.
i would suggest that dont even try to tell him he pains you!.!.!.just break up!.!.!.or suffer if you want to satisfy yourself that one day he will be good to you,which he will never!. up to you!.!.!.
sorry,the answers is harsh!.!.!.but is a fact!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
im sorry to hear this )'=
but in all honesty if your current bf isnt making you happy or reasurring you like he should do then im afraid hes either gunna have to step up to the mark n start treating you right or ur gunna have to leave him, u deserve better!. he should understand ur pain afterall thats terrible what happend to you and i can easily say that jus bout anyone who reads this is sorry for you and would give you support on the situation!.
ur best bet is to explain to him how u feel and why u do, if he still thinks getting annoyed at you is the best way to reassure you then leave him, fair nuff hes tried little things but chirst he should be bit more supportive than that, espesh if uve explained the situation!.
i hope u find ur happiness (=
Www@Answer-Health@Com
but in all honesty if your current bf isnt making you happy or reasurring you like he should do then im afraid hes either gunna have to step up to the mark n start treating you right or ur gunna have to leave him, u deserve better!. he should understand ur pain afterall thats terrible what happend to you and i can easily say that jus bout anyone who reads this is sorry for you and would give you support on the situation!.
ur best bet is to explain to him how u feel and why u do, if he still thinks getting annoyed at you is the best way to reassure you then leave him, fair nuff hes tried little things but chirst he should be bit more supportive than that, espesh if uve explained the situation!.
i hope u find ur happiness (=
Www@Answer-Health@Com
This new b/f is not right for you, if he is unable to understand and offer support for you in your current situation, and is obviously self centrd and abusive you need to get rid ASAP!.
I appreciate the difficult time you must be going through, and I wonder if you ever received any rape / grief counselling after the relevant events!. You will be sufering from grief after the loss of your baby!. Two major events inyour life need to be addressed!. I would suggest that when you have got rid of the b/f then perhaps your next step shoul dbe to speak to the doctor and seek some counselling for the rae and the loss, if this has not been done!.
Don't give up, you will need to be strong, but I perceive that as you have already progressed this far, you will have the courage and strength to see the whole thing through!. There are people who are more comapssionate and understanding of the difficulties you have ben through, frind them, trust them, then you can move on in a happier lifestyle!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I appreciate the difficult time you must be going through, and I wonder if you ever received any rape / grief counselling after the relevant events!. You will be sufering from grief after the loss of your baby!. Two major events inyour life need to be addressed!. I would suggest that when you have got rid of the b/f then perhaps your next step shoul dbe to speak to the doctor and seek some counselling for the rae and the loss, if this has not been done!.
Don't give up, you will need to be strong, but I perceive that as you have already progressed this far, you will have the courage and strength to see the whole thing through!. There are people who are more comapssionate and understanding of the difficulties you have ben through, frind them, trust them, then you can move on in a happier lifestyle!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
This is not a horrible answer but it is what I honestly read into what you have written!. In your words you say your current boyfriend has done a lot of things to hurt you!. You also say its always you that has to say sorry even though you obviously know that it should be you saying sorry!. I worry that you are staying with your current boyfriend as you are still struggling with what happened to you last summer!. What happened last summer and what followed is something you may never 100 per cent move on from but although your current boyfriend is sometimes supportive I worry that you are staying with him for the wrong reasons!. You don't deserve to be treated the way either of these guys have treated you!. But the perfect guy for you may walk right on boy while you continue to walk along holding hands with the guy that is sometimes there for you!. I think you need to speak to someone to work on what happened last summer to give you the strength to realise you don't deserve what is happening now!. Best wishes to you!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Its something rather to be thought twice!.
At one point you are getting pregnant and your boyfriend is not trying to take things seriously!.This is his first mistake!.The trauma that you underwent is beyond his imagination it seems or he doesn't want to think!.
Second he is not even bothered to calm you when you need his shoulders to cry!.Instead he is inflicting pain which is rather not tolerable!.
My dear friend,there are so many things which can tell you whether he deserves you or not!.Forget everything what happened and I will suggest you start life afresh!.Tomorrow is just another day to start a new life!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
At one point you are getting pregnant and your boyfriend is not trying to take things seriously!.This is his first mistake!.The trauma that you underwent is beyond his imagination it seems or he doesn't want to think!.
Second he is not even bothered to calm you when you need his shoulders to cry!.Instead he is inflicting pain which is rather not tolerable!.
My dear friend,there are so many things which can tell you whether he deserves you or not!.Forget everything what happened and I will suggest you start life afresh!.Tomorrow is just another day to start a new life!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Woahhh there!. You sound like you have had some problems in the past!.
Well First off, id like to say im sorry for every pain you feel!.
You should do what you need to stay stable!.
Lets pray that your boyfriend is just getting stressed because he doesnt want to see you cry!.
On the other hand, if thats not the solution, then maybe he is getting mad becuase you cried to much about something so terriable!.
Maybe, he doesnt want you to re-live the past, and keep going back to the time where things hurt the most!.
I know that this may seem aweful but it is true, i think you need to sort things out!.
Realize that it is all over, the 'bad guy' is gone, and now you have a boyfriend who cares, that doesnt want you reliving the past!.
I hope i helped!.
Be safe, be careful!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Well First off, id like to say im sorry for every pain you feel!.
You should do what you need to stay stable!.
Lets pray that your boyfriend is just getting stressed because he doesnt want to see you cry!.
On the other hand, if thats not the solution, then maybe he is getting mad becuase you cried to much about something so terriable!.
Maybe, he doesnt want you to re-live the past, and keep going back to the time where things hurt the most!.
I know that this may seem aweful but it is true, i think you need to sort things out!.
Realize that it is all over, the 'bad guy' is gone, and now you have a boyfriend who cares, that doesnt want you reliving the past!.
I hope i helped!.
Be safe, be careful!.Www@Answer-Health@Com