Question:
My mom is bulimic... please help...?
Last night, I just found out my mom is bulimic. I cannot even say how absolutely crushed, hurt, confused, scared, and sad I am. This is my mom. MY mom who is like a superhero to me. My role model and yet....she's kept this secret away from my family for the longest time. The thing is, I'm the only one that knows. Not even my dad. But you know what hurts the most? I was in 3rd grade and I immediately noticed that she would always go to the bathroom after every meal, and I would sit and listen and it just sounded like she is coughing, but then I hear something splash in the toilet. That day, I looked under the door and I found her feet facing the toilet. I opened the door and saw her getting sick. HOWEVER, WHAT JUST FRUSTRATES ME EVEN MORE IS THAT SHE GOT MAD AT ME AND TOLD ME HOW WRONG I WAS. now I realize she was just trying to protect herself from anyone knowing. But, I KNEW THIS ALL ALONG BUT I WAS STUPID AND I NEVER PUT TWO AND TWO TOGETHER AND NOW OF COURSE I FIND OUT. I cannot even say how hard I cried last night. I really really can't. Seeing my mom, who is the most confident person I have ever met, and one that I look up to, make herself sick, honestly, just killed me. I can't believe it and I just wish that this was just a dream and that I would wake up and nothing would be true. Last night when I confronted her, she didn't say anything. Except look at me, and try to say, "i'm sorry..." I asked her why she does it and she said, "this is the way i can gain control of things." WHAT CONTROL?? WHAT ELSE IS GOING ON IN YOUR LIFE THAT WE DON'T KNOW ABOUT?? WHAT CONTROL??? IS HER LIFE OUT OF CONTROL?? I'M SO SAD. AND SO CONFUSED AND SO HURT. My mom is skinny, but she does not see it. at all. :( I don't know what to do. I didn't tell anyone, but now, I'm just so scared for her. For everything. Please help, whoever is out there. I don't want to see my mommy like this. please please help. please. i'm dying inside. :( i don't even know what to do.
Answers:
You have to tell someone. Yes, it's betraying your mom's trust - but would you rather leave it and be too late to save her? A bulimic can have a fatal heart attack at any moment. They can faint and fall comatose. You don't want that to happen.
I know you're mad at your mom at the moment. But you don't understand - her life may not seem out of control to you, but to her it's like hell. Trust me, I know, I'm bulimic myself. It's not fun, it's torture. The acid burns you're throat, rots your teeth, but's it's all worth it for the euphoria and sense of control you gain from doing it. It's also addictive. People can't understand why a bulimic does it, and even doctors have a hard time understanding, too. But at the moment, that's all you can try and do for your mom, as well as getting her some serious help.
I wish someone would help me, but no one knows. Use your knowledge to save her life.
God bless you and your mother.