I'm always happy to see my period now..?!


Question: I'm always happy to see my period now..?
So since I actually started having sex, I just can't get over being scared of getting pregnant. I'm on birth control, I'm literally 100% perfect about it. Like the pill every day, exactly 24 hours apart, down to the minute, never missed one and never been late. I'm generally pretty good at remembering things and I like being really consistent about everything I do especially with routines, but that with my added paranoia for pregnancy makes me the worlds best pill taker here. We also use condoms any time I'm even a little unsure of it, like when I'm on antibiotics or something, or if I just feel like we should (because I'm freaking paranoid).

I've already been on this current birth control for two months which was when I started the relationship I'm in now. I've been on birth control before for a pretty long time but it's the first time I've actually been in a consistently sexual relationship and I can't get over the fear of pregnancy even though I have no reason really to fear it.. I know the only 100% way to prevent pregnancy is not to have sex but I'm not willing to do that because I know my fear is illogical. 100% as opposed to 99.9% is not enough to make me think denying my sexuality is worth it from an intellectual standpoint. I've never been pregnant before either, or even had an actual scare. And I don't want to be too graphic here, but so far I've had plenty of chances to get pregnant in this relationship, and I never have before. So from experience, I know my birth control is working great, and from research and logic I know it's working too.

But I just can't stop worrying about it :(

It's to the point where I'm so happy and relieved to see my period now even though I hate the thing! It's just that confirmation of not being pregnant.

I guess my real question is, how can I put my mind at ease about pregnancy? I'm definitely taking every precaution so what are maybe some tips,or things to keep in mind that can make me relax about this, and dread my periods like a normal person (haha..)?

Answers:

I had a friend who was like this. It's understandable.

One thing I'd ask is (and obviously you don't have to answer), but how do you feel about abortion. It might sound like a crazy/terrible thing to say, but the reality is that there is that option if you did get pregnant. What I mean is that realizing that even if you do get pregnant, even then it's not necessary to stay pregnant. If you miss a period you go to the gynecologist who prescribes the pill for you. They're professional. They will not be angry or judge you. Again, this is if that .01% chance occurs and you do somehow get pregnant, one slips by, there are options. There is even the very viable option of adoption if you aren't comfortable with abortion or with the idea of that being the only way to go. It isn't.

So imagining the actual consequences calmly and realistically is what I'm saying might help. Think about them, and let it roll over in your mind while staying calm. If having information helps you (it does for me) I'd even suggest visiting a planned parenthood near you to talk about what all the options are and what they mean. I've linked the page below to their "locations" page. Talking to someone out loud about your fear/anxiety, like your boyfriend, might also help. I freak out about stuff often enough and my boyfriend's usually the first one to hear about it-- poor guy. He's comforting when it's a real concern, but usually he just shakes his head knowingly.

Another thing is. I've been on the pill for over two years now, and my boyfriend and I of two years, while we used condoms at first, stopped after a few months, for obvious reasons, but only after we both got a full workup at the doctor. There was no reason to think anything was wrong on either of our parts, but it was partially a matter of principle, and partially a matter of respect for each other. In any case we've never had a problem. My gynecologist was the one that told me that since I was in a stable, long-term, monogamous relationship, there wasn't really any "need." The extent to which using a condom increases the odd of your not getting pregnant, well I suppose in a sense it practically eliminates the odds (which is a thought that should comfort you) but the odds of getting pregnant if you take the pill every day are very very very slim. I've never really had a scare either. Once I got my period late, within the time I was supposed to, but still that tremendously freaked out both my boyfriend and myself. Particularly because we were out of the country and wanted to get me to a doctor right away for a blood test (incidentally the only 100% sure way of knowing that you are pregnant). I think I may have been just a little late that time though because I actually missed several days of the pill and had to catch up. I never take the pill at exactly the same time, and as I've already said, I have been known to miss a day. It still works very effectively because it keeps your hormones at a certain level.

So, if you take your pill as religiously as you do, AND you guys are using condoms... you are doing everything you can to prevent getting pregnant. When you start to feel anxious about it, begin to worry or even when you feel relieved at getting your period, try to squelch those feelings and not indulge them. At exactly that moment remind yourself of all the rational logical reasons there are that you will not get pregnant, but that if you do, you will handle it with the help and support of your partner. Because that's the truth.

Hope that helps-- you can do it!

http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-…



To stop worrying about pregnancy, you could get your tubes tied ;)



i honestly have the SAME exact problem. but what i do, is i just dont worry about it. i know it's hard not to, but you have to trust the other person. and you have to trust yourself. if you're taking your birth control like you should, and using condoms then you should be fine. it's still okay to worry a little but dont let your fear take over your life. like, if everything goes fine then no need to worry. but if a condom breaks or you forget to take your pill, then you can worry. good luck :)




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