Question:
She wants to marry me but she is keep our relationship a secret from people! Advice Needed?
Im 32 and have been with my beautiful girlfriend for 9 months, She is 25 and a dancer/bartender at a venue my band usually does gigs at. She moved to LA almost 2yrs ago and the first time we met we kept making eye contact and she mesmerized me, She is so laid back. I kept asking her out and she kept laughing & saying no to me, I kept at her to go out with me for 2wks, She finally agreed to only have a drink with me & we've been together since, I never felt what i felt with her with anyone else. We have kept our relationship to ourselves as her job has rules that their employees are not to date the band members that draw in the crowds, When i told her that she shouldn't give a f*ck she told me that her job means alot to her & she needs it, although i can provide for her. Im on the road a lot touring but she is always on my mind, I keep wanting her to be with me, I've had a load of girls in the past but i have never been this way with anyone, I don't just want her i need her. We've talked about eloping many times but never did it. To me shes the only girl in the world that matters, I would love to marry her. I cant stand the fact that other guys flirt with her in front of me and she just laughs it off. When we are together we are really happy and she is usually at my place, he basically lives there, She always tells me how much shes in love with me & even started crying when i last had to go on the road saying shes gonna go crazy without me. I don't know what else to do i don't want to hide our relationship anymore as its driving me crazy. Any advice?
Answers:
Best Answer - Chosen by Voters
Keeping her job gives her independence and you should support that. In her mind she sees great stability in this job. We are in a recession and jobs are not that easy to come by. Have you talk to her about changing jobs so that you can be more outward with your relationship? Even though you have told her that you can take care of her she likes her Independence. What would she do with her time while you are on the road if she quits her job, or her boss finds out and fires her? 9 months is not a long time to know a persons past experience, which is the catapult to her feeling the way she does.
Ask her "Why are you so ashamed of me that you have to hind our love?" Tell her you will NOT marry her till she tell people.