Never had the sex talk?!


Question: Never had the sex talk?
Well, I'm not gonna lie.. no matter how odd this question is c: .. Okay well I'm a 12 year old girl and I do masturbate I think my parents know cuz one time my dad walked in and walked out it was AKWARD!!! I had my period 1 month ago and I didn't know it was my period cuz my mom or dad NEVER EVER talked to me about that and I thought it was like number 2 .. o_o but later I figured it out from like looking it up.. my mom bought me some stupid body book and pads blah blah.. anyways, my friends said all there parents gave them ' the talk ' .. Oddly i wish they gave me the talk before my period cuz i had it for like 3 weeks without knowing! Wow. I feel like they don't care.. like after i had it i cried -.- and when I ask for a bra my mom says i don't need it and I don't have any thing but really i do.. okay sorry this question is kinda weird /: anyways i have no clue about this stuff and I'm soon to be 13.. Okay i have some clue but i wish they would talk to me. we dont have sex ed at all.. i go to a private school so yeah. are they bad parents? i mean i want to embrace growing up but they said its wrong for me to need a bra this young and im not aloud to go swimming because i need a padded bathing suit. they said i have to be 15 to use a tampon? is that true!! its almost summer and i wanna swim! please help? WHATS WRONG WITH THEM!!

Answers:

Well your parents might be a little shy about talking about it. I'm 14 and my parents never really gave a talk but my mother asked if i had my period (we sex ed at my school) and i asked for a bra and got a training one although i had something there... but that's okay because sometimes parents aren't comfortable talking about that kind of stuff.

It's not true that you must be 15 to wear tampons. Maybe it is a rule in your house, but i don't think that's right for them to do that. I think the way your parents are rasing you is kind off odd. You can have breasts at any age and it's perfectly normal to want a bra and you should be able get one.

You should try purchasing some of those items yourself at the mall or at a drugstore.

Try better communication skills with your parents too! It can help :D

Best wishes !!

Experience



I agree with all the others answers here but I want to say that tampons are perfectly healthy. The only thing is you may get TSS (Toxic Shock Syndrome) by keeping it in for more than 8 hours. But other than that they are just as fine as pads. And there's not a specific age to using them.



They are just afraid to have that talk with you because then they have to accept that you are growing up. Try asking a teacher or guidance counselor for a book about puberty. :)



That is weird because I also go to a private school and we get sex ed and same thing both my parents abandoned me and my guardian never told me and I didnt know what was happening.



I would definitely hold off on using tampons for atleast a year after starting your period.



ok, about the bra, if you really need it ask your mom again, about tampons do not use them they are not healthy.



My parents never gave me the talk either. When I tried to approach them about it when I was 10, my mom told me periods and sex was "teenager and adult talk" and that was it. It's not even true, because my friend got her period at 12, and I got mine only 2 weeks after I turned 13.


Hey at least your mom got you a book. My mom didn't even try to discuss it. I found out from my friends, the internet, and school and I know more about periods, puberty, and sex than any of my friends. And their parents actually gave them the talk.

You don't have to be 15 to use tampons? I'm 13, and I use them.



wow are your parents amish or something? i thought my mom was bad about not telling me things. she didnt tell me where tampons go or what they were for til i started my period, then she hands me one of hers, which looks like a stick of dynamite. i couldnt use tampons till i was 17 or 18 cuz i had endometriosis, but yours sound fine. pads make ur period suck even worse. u can get very slim tampons. try platex gentle glide or platex sport. tampax pearl are ok too, and u can get the light ones to start practicing with bcuz they are very small. just remember to aim toward ur lower back when inserting, and change it every 4 hours. i really think u need to try tampons, u are old enough. ur life will be miserable this summer without them, and pads can leak and lead to embarassment. see if a friend or fam member will take u shopping then buy some yourself. dont be ashamed of it, u are a normal girl who is past puberty. as for bras...idk why they would want u to not wear one, that is more immodest than wearing one. i am small busted, but i had to start wearing a bra in 7th grade. i was smaller than an A cup, so i got a sports bra with light padding. if u are unsure of how to buy a bra, there are lots of helpful sites for how to measure online. i think u are just going to have to start doing things for urself cuz ur parents sound like idiots. u could always have a conversation with them and tell them that u feel u cant talk to them about this stuff, and do they want u to end up getting date raped bcuz u dont know anything? if u can take care of the bra and tampon thing yourself, worry about sex later. u dont need to know about the specifics at your age, u dont wanna know. stay away from boys til ur older. i personally think girls should wait til after high school. but htere is NOTHING wrong with using tampons, u cannot lose your virginity to a tampon! just read the directions and look online for stuff to learn about ur own womanly anatomy.
and regarding TSS, my hs biology teach told me that only happens when u dont have clean hands and use a tampon, or if u drop it on the floor or something then use it. just be smart, ull be ok.



Awh your adorable dOnt worry they do care about you I'm 16 going on 17 and I still don't wear tampons but there's not a certain age that you do wear them hahaha I started my period in 6th grAde and had no clue about anything basically I knew nothing about sex even when I had it which was only a couple days ago I still dont know that much just look up about sex and what not your so young it doesn't really matter hHaha just don't worry



Wow, that's too bad. Your parents sound really conservative and repressed about sex. So now you've grown up in 2 ways: 1) you got your period, and 2) you've realized your parents don't know everything and aren't perfect, and you have different views than they do. Unfortunately you're going to have to live under their roof for awhile, which means going along with some of the things they do that you have seen are wrong. Like, they don't want you to grow up so they try to pretend you are still a kid by insisting you not wear a bra and not use tampons, and totally ignoring "the talk". They do love you, but they have their blind spots. You'll have to act according to their wishes to a certain extent, but when you leave their house you can make your own decisions, and hopefully they will be responsible ones.

Anyway, if you want to get info that is kind of geared to teenagers, go to www. scarleteen.com. They've got a lot there.



my guess is they love you and look at you as their baby and don't want to see you grow up. it's typical all parents are like that.. i wouldn't worry about it...... as for the sex talk... if you REALLY want to know about it, i would be happy to tell you everything... i'm a teenager, i'm not a perverted adult lol...

grat555@yahoo.com please please email me. thank you.




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