Need answers from positive ppl cuz i know alotta ppl on here are rude so if that!


Question: Need answers from positive ppl cuz i know alotta ppl on here are rude so if thats yu i dont want your advice?
Im 18 and avery healthy woman. I have a 13 month old son who i love more than anything. We are engaged to be married this october i will be 19 by then. And im done with school i am a certified nursing assistant great job for my age. Me n my sons father my fiance live together. And life is really great for me. And i always wanted more kids and i dont wana wait too long. The question i asked earlier. Well im not pregnant according to my dr. Well i don want my first kids to be years apart and i want another baby i know im still young and some say i should way. But im independent i pay my own bills me and my fiancee have a education. So should i wait by me being 18 or go for it. My son already says sissy and he loves other kids so im like why not? He wants a playmate. And i want some positive answers plz. And btw his mom disagrees but me and him want another one. We want atleat four. Bt for the last two we want atleast a five year gap

Answers:

Can I just say that's awesome to hear you are doing so well at so young. Not many people can say that. If you want to have another child or not is a personal decision between you and your fiance. You have to think about your financial situation and what you want to accomplish in your near future. Children and the other costs with them are expensive as I'm sure you know, but you have to think of other things you may have to give up by having more kids right away, like buying a house of your own at the moment. I would make a pro and con list. You may want to wait until after the wedding because that could get stressful, but I'm sure if you made it this far than you can make a good decision on your own.



If you can financially afford to provide for your current child and a new baby, then why not?



I agree, He will need a playmate. So go for it.



The only question you have to answer is" are you financially secure enough to handle a second child, easily? If so, who the hell cares how old you are! In some cultures, you'd be married with 3 kids by now. The only thing you'd need to worry about is money and support from your future husband. If you make enough money to support another child, and you and your fiance are both in this 100%, there is absolutely no reason you shouldn't go for it.
That being said, if you aren't very sure you're dedicated to raising a family with him, or you think you might run tight on money or stress, then this is something to think about. Because although it's what you want, if I were you, I'd think more on the side of what your kids need. And if you only have the money, support, and stability to handle one child, then I suggest you give him everything you can, spoil him rotten, and wait until you are ready to give your next child as much as they deserve.
Good luck!



As long as you and your finance can financially and mentally handle and support a 2nd child and your doctor says you are healthy and there aren't any risks then I say go for it. I am very proud that you are finished with school and have a great paying job at such a young age. Way to go, I support! It is very possible for you to have two small children at 18 and still be well off. A friend of mine has 2 children ages 15 months and 4 months and she is only 19 and is doing excellent!



Just thought I'd add in my own perspective! Kids are great, and no one else can decide for you if you want to have them. I have a couple of thoughts.

1) Relationships take work. You're already raising a toddler and about to start a marriage. Financial situation aside, are you going to have the time and energy that your marriage deserves if you have another kid? Couples that are able to make time for each other enjoy much more successful relationships than couples who don't have time outside of the kids. Unless you've known this guy since you were 13, I don't think you've had years and years to get to know each other yet.

2) You are responsible for children until they are 18. Just keep that in mind for the future. If you have them as close together as possible (even with that 5 year gap) you'll only be raising kids until you're about 45. The longer you wait, the higher that number goes. Now that can be a good thing or not depending on what you're looking forward to. If you want to raise children all your life, waiting won't be a problem, and will mean that you might be more relaxed. It's a very different thing to have an 8-year-old kid as your oldest when the last baby is born than it is to have a 14-year-old kid who can change diapers and is responsible for their own laundry. On the other hand, if you're looking forward to the chance to eventually travel and spend time one-on-one with your husband when you get older, you might want to do the kid thing now and just have grandbabies to play with in your older age.

Those are my thoughts! Hope it helps.




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