I am stuck?!

I am stuck?

You might of read my previous question..if you didnt here it is


Ok , I don't know much about anorexia, but maybe you can help me. I think i am semi-anorexic. I think about being anorexic all the time and seeing ppl like on youtube saying I had anorexia && stuff. I wish I was them. I mean like I wish I had there life. I am not overweight nor underweight, yet. I am 13 4'10 and 68lbs. I think it would be so great to be anorexic..&& its not to be blamed by the media. I would never wanna be Nicole Richie. I wanna be like ppl who have anorexia and arent famous. I have to make sure I am still the same weight in the morning afternoon or night. Or i will stop eating, but not completetly. I make sure My ribs still show in my stomach, if they dont I think right away..I am fat!
I do see myself in the mirror with big flabby thighs and big arms, everyone says My legs are sticks and you can see bones in my back. I dont get it I can never see myself the way I wanna be seen. What do i have?

2 weeks ago
I cant tell my parents its too hard and they would never understand...I dont wanna go to a counselor b.c. my parents would have to make the appoinment and they would find out. I just dont know what to do?

I think I understand because I think I am kind of the same, except I don't wish to be anorexic. I am underweight and I don't put on weight anyway but I still like to make sure that I am the same weight. When I look in the mirror I guess I see something that other people don't because I don't think I'm particularly skinny but I often get comments that I am. I also like my ribs to show.

From what you are saying it kind of sounds like Body Dysmorphic Disorder which may be triggering anorexia.

Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) is a mental disorder that involves a disturbed body image. It is generally diagnosed in those who are extremely critical of their physique or self image, despite the fact there may be no noticeable disfigurement or defect.

Most people wish they could change or improve some aspect of their physical appearance, but people suffering from BDD, generally considered of normal appearance, believe that they are so unspeakably hideous that they are unable to interact with others or function normally for fear of ridicule and humiliation at their appearance. They tend to be very secretive and reluctant to seek help because they are afraid others will think them vain or they may feel too embarrassed to do so.

You have to remember that if other people are telling you that you are skinny then it's true and they wouldn't say it if it wasn't. Don't try and convince yourself that you NEED to lose weight. Instead of looking i the mirror to see how your body is try looking at photos instead. I didn't realise how skinny I was until I saw photos of myself but is BDD is your problem then this probably won't help. You need to get help, is there anyone at school you can talk to who can help?