Why do i Change Myself?!
Question: Everytime something Bad happens i Try and Change my image or My Personallity.
Eg; I Bleached my hair when my boyfriend moved away, Started Drinking when my Dad Left and Started smoking When My Boyfriend Fineshed Me) Thats just a Few To name.
When do you think i do this?
To me its like Everytime something Bad happends i have to Change myself because Its like Starting Fresh and i have To Get Rid of the Old Me. If you sort off Get Me; I Carnt exsplain.
Well i just want to know what to do about it im Kind of scared that next time something bad happpends im going To start doing drugs or something Stupid.
Answers; Please
Katiebabes.
Answers: Everytime something Bad happens i Try and Change my image or My Personallity.
Eg; I Bleached my hair when my boyfriend moved away, Started Drinking when my Dad Left and Started smoking When My Boyfriend Fineshed Me) Thats just a Few To name.
When do you think i do this?
To me its like Everytime something Bad happends i have to Change myself because Its like Starting Fresh and i have To Get Rid of the Old Me. If you sort off Get Me; I Carnt exsplain.
Well i just want to know what to do about it im Kind of scared that next time something bad happpends im going To start doing drugs or something Stupid.
Answers; Please
Katiebabes.
Well, my sense is that when something happens that makes you feel bad, you try to distance yourself from the bad feeling by trying to be someone different - someone who DOESN'T feel bad. Of course, the problem is that you are still you so it doesn't really work well, but it provides a temporary fix.
This suggests that the bad feelings are so overwhelming that you cannot be with them and face them and work through them - it's all just too much, too frightening, as if you're going to disintegrate.
You probably don't feel hugely good about yourself at heart, so you can't soothe yourself with knowing you're OK. It's possible that things could get so bad you get into drugs to numb out the bad feelings - after all, you have already started two drugs, alcohol and nicotine, neither of which are very good for you and can be more addictive then heroin (yes, honestly). But if you could go for counselling/psychotherapy, the obvious self-awareness and intelligence you demonstrate in this question could be put to good use and you could work through the underlying problems, feel generally more solid and good about yourself, and stop having to run away from difficult feelings. I really hope this will be possible.
You feel the need to get rid of the past, so you change yourself for a fresh start. There's positives and negatives to this..
Next time why don't you try changing yourself in a positive way? Example...
Something bad happens:
-Decide to start expressing yourself in a journal
-Decide to start getting some counseling
-Decide to start doing some volunteer work
-Decide to start making a photo album
-Decide to start making cards for people
-Decide to get a job
-Decide to find a church/or become more active in one
-Decide to start looking for new and better friends
-Decide to start exercising