Parental Problems?!
Question: My family is rather defunct. We are a very wealthy white family living in a high-end neighborhood with nice cars and expensive clothes and all of that materialistic sh-t. We are expected to maintain a perfect image representative of the family, and we are held to this standard to a great extent.
I have always been the odd one. I am a twin, born 2.5 months premature. I was 2.4 lbs and my twin sister was 4.11 or something, and I was very underdeveloped other than my brain. There are 4 other siblings, all between ages 23 and 30. We have been verbally abused by my mother since childhood, as well physically when she is totally enraged. None of the children have any affection toward her... just demanded respect.
I was diagnosed with bipolar last year, after struggling in school, behavior, and socialization. This was unthinkable by my parents... it is a stain to the family name.
I was eavesdropping last night from the entryway banister, and my mom was *****-ing about the hell
Answers: My family is rather defunct. We are a very wealthy white family living in a high-end neighborhood with nice cars and expensive clothes and all of that materialistic sh-t. We are expected to maintain a perfect image representative of the family, and we are held to this standard to a great extent.
I have always been the odd one. I am a twin, born 2.5 months premature. I was 2.4 lbs and my twin sister was 4.11 or something, and I was very underdeveloped other than my brain. There are 4 other siblings, all between ages 23 and 30. We have been verbally abused by my mother since childhood, as well physically when she is totally enraged. None of the children have any affection toward her... just demanded respect.
I was diagnosed with bipolar last year, after struggling in school, behavior, and socialization. This was unthinkable by my parents... it is a stain to the family name.
I was eavesdropping last night from the entryway banister, and my mom was *****-ing about the hell
It certainly isnt your fault that your parents are fighting. They have their own issues. However, it seems to me that your mom might be bipolar or she might have other unlying mental problems that necessitates medication. Is she on any kind of medication? There are many types of bipolar as you know. My son has bipolar I with manic tendencies, then theres bipolar II and bipolar NOS (not otherwise specified) and then theres mixed bipolar. The bipolar NOS has many derivatives. As you also know, only a doctor can diagnose someone with bipolar.
From everything I read, bipolar is genetic and it comes from the mother. I have been trying to trace it through my family but I dont think my mother had it but I do think my father had and still has it as well as me. Im on zoloft and I take omega fish oil. I, too, dont like to take pills. I do if i have to. I would suggest that the next time you see your doctor, you explain all of this to him and see what he thinks. Some people will not ever accept the fact that they have an illness. This very well can be the case of your mother.
I was just thinking how mature you are to be so pro active in your treatment and eventual recovery and my son, who does absolutely nothing to self improve and wastes all his time playing video games. I would say he plays video games more than one-third of his time. He sleeps ten hours now so that should tell you just how much he plays video games and hes twenty one.
You must be destined for great things because, at your age, you have lived the life of someone three times your age. Remember, what doesnt kill you will make you stronger.
Sorry for the rambling, Im very nervous and contemplating going back to the doctor again. Sniff, sniff. I hate doctors, I hate meds too. You know exactly what Im talking about and here i go rambling again I am sorry.
And im sorry I cant help. But I keep hoping and researching that the answers will come to me so I can help both you and my son. Only then, will I rest. Only then.
It's not you that is tearing your family apart, it seems your mother has issues that she needs to deal with and her issues are tearing the family apart. Your mom probably needs some counseling herself. Are you seeing a psychiatrist because of your bipolar, because these are probably issues you should be discussing with him/her. Growing up is rough already but it sounds like you are facing a lot of issues you can't handle. Maybe talk to your father and see if he can get you help with a professional to work these things out.
i so can relate regarding mother issues, you see my mom she calls me fat and liar infront of everybody even infront of our helpers she once told me my feet are smelly infront of them, i brushed them aside but it really hurts my feelings, what i did was i rented an apartment with my friend and there searched for my self, i had a great year without her breathing on my ear, but then she got sick and so i was back in the house. I am having a difficult time in my house with her, but i can't do anything because she's my mother, but sometimes i tell her if she's done something wrong, if you can leave ur house do so, and find your self.
You haven't caused your family. You are a product of your family + your individual preferences. You have a mother that's very unstable and unpredictable and that's like falling into an ambush over and over again. You have probably been, still are, living in constant stress and that's disastrous for you!
Your mother has huge problems and the rest of the family suffers because of her. Of course you have been struggling and behaving - you have been symptomizing your family's illness! One in the family usually does.
And it's of course even worse if your parents are concerned about the image of a perfect and successful family.
You are living under huge stress and in huge lies. Try to keep a distance to your parents - a mental distance. Focus on your own future and what you have to do to get a good one. Put your energy to that and understand that you can't change your parents behaviour. It's not your fault at all. It's your parents who can't deal with their problems in a mature way.