My girlfriend suffered child abuse when she was young.?!


Question: My girlfriend suffered child abuse when she was young!.!?
She was physically abused by her dad as a child!.She is haunted by the memories of it and turns to alcohol to try to forget them!.

We talk about it,and i tell her that she is safe with me and that she will always be loved,but she just cant move on!.She has been to therapy for this,but it only seems to give temporary relief!.Does anyone have any suggestions as to how she can put this behind her!? and what i can do to help make her feel better!? we are both in our early 20's but i feel she needs to get this resolved so she can enjoy life!.Www@Answer-Health@Com


Answers:
That is true she need it to resolved so she can enjoy life!.But its not easy as u think it is cause i been there!.Not with my dad but with another man,i was only 5 years old when he started at that time and stop around 8 years old i was the victim and he never got goth!.I am 52 years old now and still think about it i made a big depression with that!.I have a hard time to be with a man!.I always think that all the men are the same,and i don't truss anybody even women or my family !.Cause i been touch by my brother to,so that doesn't help either and my parents never believe me so that was hard to,they say it was all in my head so i started to put it far away in to my head!.Then i just explode at 27 years old!.I go and see a special doctor for that now,but it is hard to forget about it any way cause it is constantly in my head,until i don't resolve the problem to let it go and be positive it will all ways hunt me till i die,i guess,but hope not!.So give her lost of support cause she believe in u cause she confident in u and lots of love the best way that u can,don't force her in too doing some things she does not want to do please!.And to take of the pain that hunt her is not that easy so may God Bless her,and i am sending Angels to help her!.And i will pray for her to!.A VICTIM OF ABUSE MYSELF!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

She obviously needs to find a better psychologist who specialized in sex abuse!. She should first be seen by a psychiatrist to see if she suffers from any disorders because of the trauma she went through!. Medication may do wonders for her!. Then she needs to work through this by seeing a psychologist/counselor as much as they suggest!. God bless both of you!. She may even be told that she needs AA!. A professional will be able help her, and your loving friendship is priceless!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

I'm not sure it can ever really be resolved!. I think the best thing you can do is try to help her keep her mind off of it, until therapy really starts helping, which she should continue going to!. Keep supposrting her and letting her know you're there for her!.!.!. I think thats truly the best thing you can do for her!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

Well, you're being really supportive and that's great!. You need to let go and be there for her as she needs you!. There;s not much more you can do and don;t blame yourself!. She will likely need a lot of space and might even find it hard to share her feelings!. I would advise you to not bring up the issue to her as much instead just be there for her in a loving way!. Let her be the one to start talking about it if she feels like it!. When she does, just listen and support!. Don't give any "advise" unless specifically asked!. Above all, don't expect anything from her!. If you feel she cannot give you what you want, then end it or maybe stay friends!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

Well idk if this would help
but my grandpa used to hypnotize people
so he could help them with their problems
and he figured put exactly what they were afraid of
and figured out something to get over that fear
even though it sounds a little over the edge
it may help
!?
(:Www@Answer-Health@Com

TAKE HER OUT AND DO STUFF WITH HER TO FORGET ABOUT IT!.!.!.
MAKE HER FEEL MORE SAFE AND MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS SHE WONT GET ABUSED AGAIN!.!.!.
ALSO PRAY FOR HER
HOPE THIS HELPSWww@Answer-Health@Com

Try a therapy known as EMDR!. It is highly effective for resolving past trauma!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

PULEASE TAKE HER OUT AND DO STUFF WITH HER, OMG!. Okay first of all she needs to forgive herself and her abuser!. That is usually the first step to moving forward and recovering from abuse!. Second, she needs to discuss this with someone, as in a therapist!. Also, is this an excuse to drink!? You know alcoholics will find any excuse to drink!. It's raining I have to drink, the sun is shining I have to drink, that sort of thing!. Also, alcoholics are very very manipulative so don't be conned!. She needs AA and you need Al-Anon!. An alcoholic is addicted to alcohol and the people that are involved with the alcoholic are addicted to the alcoholic!. That is co-dependency and I can tell you have issues of co-dependency just because you asked this question!. FOCUS ON YOU AND LET HER FOCUS ON HER!.Www@Answer-Health@Com

The problem with counseling is if you don't take the tools you learn and apply them to coping!. I know for myself I stopped counseling thinking it just makes it worse re-living it by talking about it, but in reality looking back!.!.!.I left at a critical time when I should have stayed, it really is years of recovery to work through it!.

Here's the issue, by supressing the emotions, by not letting go of the memories and by not forgiving, you are allowing the abuser to still have control over you!. It will effect all your relationships wether friendship, romantic, work etc!.!.!. it effects the choices you make and the way you react to things!.

The biggest number one way for her to move on is to Forgive, ya it sucks and ya how do you do that!. For me it wasn't about making excuses for their behavior, There was no way in hell I was going to ever speak to or see that person again, but by taking the tools I learned from counselor like writing a letter to the abuser expressing my feelings and what they did to me, by Taking a nerf bat and beating a pillow to allow the anger to come (because I surpressed it), by working on my self esteem that I am worthy of love, this allowed me to come to a place to Let go!.!.!.!. (maybe not exactly forgive)

not sure if this helps, but you can't do it for her, she has to do it for herself!.

Here are some resources:
Getting Over Getting Mad by Judy Ford
Loving the me I see by Angela Clay

Also I did a Caron foundation workshop It was the best gift i gave myself, of course for me it was an 8 hour drive, and they also have a location in Florida !. http://www!.caron!.org/workshops!.cfm#215

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