What kind of advice can i give her??!


Question: have a friend who's gotten 2 abortions at the request of her boyfriend and had 1 miscarriage as a result from a car accident. She's 23 and was messing around with a 17 year old next door neighbor who is still in high school, they had one long week of wild sex with no condom. Yesterday she found out she's 3 weeks pregnant. She called the the 17 year old because he's the father since she has not had sex in a while before meeting him and he said that's her fault and doesn't want to have anything to do with it. Also he has a newborn...which is a few weeks old....this story is pretty ridiculous...i have warn her time and time again to be careful and always be protected...but she always tell me crap like this after the fact...so what should she do???


Answers: have a friend who's gotten 2 abortions at the request of her boyfriend and had 1 miscarriage as a result from a car accident. She's 23 and was messing around with a 17 year old next door neighbor who is still in high school, they had one long week of wild sex with no condom. Yesterday she found out she's 3 weeks pregnant. She called the the 17 year old because he's the father since she has not had sex in a while before meeting him and he said that's her fault and doesn't want to have anything to do with it. Also he has a newborn...which is a few weeks old....this story is pretty ridiculous...i have warn her time and time again to be careful and always be protected...but she always tell me crap like this after the fact...so what should she do???

You already did your job as a friend by warning her on various occasions, now what is she gonna do NOW, that's entirely her problem since you were certainly not the one who pushed her to have unprotected sex (and, with a minor, on top of it all). So, since she's the only one "legally responsible" (the "father", obviously, is not), she should keep making her own decisions in regard to the unwanted pregnancy, as well. I think that if you keep putting your two cents in that business - disregarding your good intentions - you'll end up being the one to blame the most. Besides, if she wasn't listening while you were talking then - with all due respect - what makes you think she might follow your advice at all, now?!? Consequently, you can keep listening to her if she needs someone to talk to, but, you should refrain yourself from further advice and help offerings, no matter how difficult it might be for you. Good luck to both of you!!

get ready to go to hell..

mature and grow up


but advice only goes so far
in the end she's going to make her own choice

I don't mean to sound harsh, but she will eventually have to learn from her own mistakes.

if she is older enogh to open her legs then she should be older enough to take responsibilitie of her actions.

if youve warned her before and she still didnt want advice, she's made her bed and now she must lay in it

Things are very complecated here really i dont know what to say , but i strongly belive that abortion is a big sin, it is killing your own kids that is not good i dont think it is a good idea any way hope you will not mind what i have said but honestly that is what i think

let her live her life

Why do you feel responsible for her immaturity? You've already given her the best advice you can -- stop having careless sex. If she chose to disregard your advice and has to deal with the consequences, it's not your fault or your responsibility. You can sympathize and tell her you're sorry to hear this but nothing more is required. Besides, if you take responsibility for her actions, *she* doesn't have to, and she may feel more empowered to keep doing what she wants to do without thinking about consequences. I'm guessing she hasn't even been tested for AIDS/syphilis/gonorrhea/chlamydia/herpes ... which, given her lifestyle, seems to be likely in her future, if not already. So, I take it back, you could suggest she get herself tested.

There may be a legal issue here though, depending on the age of consent in your country/state; if the age of consent is 18 or higher then she may have committed a crime.

I don't think it's ok when anyone has abortion upon somebody else's request. It has to be her choice. If you want to advise her, make her sure she's the one that has a word about herfself, and that she's the one who's responsible for her own choices.





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